After reading the article below from Business Insider it made me think about my childhood and how I am currently raising my children. There is a lot of similarities, yet a few things that I view differently probably because of how I was raised.
The first thing on the list is “They Make Their Kids Do Chores”.
I don’t necessarily make the kids do certain things around the house, but I do expect them to be respectful and help out. Setting the table, cleaning the table, shoveling the drive way after a snow fall, and most importantly picking up after themselves. My daughter at 12 years old can do her own laundry, cook dinner and take care of a few other things. That doesn’t mean that I make her cook dinner for the family as a chore, but I do involve her in the process on a regular basis. I want my children to learn responsibility and to do things without being asked. To learn to be respectful and to “take care of business”.
When I was growing up I had a few things on my list to do like cut the grass, but it was the items or task not on my list of chores that I did the most. If the trash was full, I took it out with out being asked. My kids do the same. DIshes in hte sink, load or unload the dishwasher. My children understand that as a team we all need to do our part.
The next thing mentioned on the list is “They Teach Their Kids Social Skills”
This is a MUST! There is no alternative. My children shake hands when they meet someone and look them in the eye. They order their own meals politely when we go out and they effectively communicate for themselves if they want something. There is no other way and this is a must to survive in today’s society. We don’t hide behind devices. He put them down and interact or communicate.
#3 is “High Expectations”
There is no question about this. My children know they are going to college and getting a degree. They know grades are essential in school today. My children understand there is no giving up or quitting. You start something, you finish it. This is how I was raised, and this is how I will push my children as well. Now, don’t get me wrong, every expectation is set at a level of achievement. I never set goals so high that they will never reach them and set them up for failure. I push, I encourage and from time to time I am stern with them as I expect more from them when they do not give the effort. We have a saying about “Perfect Practice Makes Perfect” and “I Want Solutions Not Excuses” The third on is a saying that I learned playing football in college; “MTXE – Mental Toughness Extra Effort. This is how we attack everything that we do in life, 100% or not all. Nothing is given to us and we work for everything. Effort is what counts whether your fail or not. If you fall, you get up. That is what counts. If you did the best you can and still fail, then you learn and more on.
The article also discusses my educational background and relationships with each other. Yes, I have an MBA. Yes, my children and I have a great relationship, but they also have good relationships with each other. They support each other. This is a must and is encouraged and demanded at the same time.
I was always taught and raised with respect. I was not raised with the “I am Your Father and I Said So Mentality”. I was treated as an equal and I treat my two the same way. I think this is one of the main reasons I have such a great relationship with my parents and my children. We all have open communication on all levels.
Click HERE to see the entire article.